Special Bulletin

Let me tell you what happened to me the other day…

I bought an exercise dvd because I’m tired of being tired. I want to get into shape, I want to fit into my clothes again, and I want energy - LOTS of it!

So I put on my old sweats, slipped in the dvd, and here was this barely 20 something girl in the shape of a toothpick, grinning menacingly (I swear!) at the camera like she was going to take a bite out it. Or me.

“Don’t worry,” she says. “We’re going to start out sloooowwww.”

Grin grin grin.

Barely five minutes into her jumping/gyrating/vibrating routine, I collapsed on the couch, completely confused, frustrated and ANNOYED.

Maybe, just maybe I could have kept up with her for awhile if something she did made SENSE.

But just when I was able to copy one of her moves, she was on to the next one like a frenzied rabid rabbit.

“Okay,” she grins, “Put your right arm up and step with your left foot and put your left arm out and hop with your right leg while bending at the waist and touch your forehead to the floor and snap back up and whirl your arms while moving your legs out and in and then turn left and slide down and roll and back up and bend and touch your head to your butt and…”

Who exercises like this???

Not me.

I’m over 40.

I want to get in shape.

I want to feel good, look good, and have lots of energy.

I don’t need a barely 20’s chicklet telling me, someone twice her age, how to get in shape.

Because frankly, she doesn’t have a clue.

What she teaches might be fine for people her age.

But I want to learn from someone MY age or older who is in the best shape of their lives.

Now THAT’S someone who can teach me how to be fit and feel great…

…and I know you probably feel the same way.

So I went online and started searching…

…and I think I’ve hit the mother lode.

Check out

http://bevopub.hop.clickbank.net

The headline reads…

43-Year-Old Dallas Man Uncovers A Step By Step System For Living Fit And Healthy At Any Age That Is Literally Reshaping Bodies World-wide!

Okay, it sounds a little “sensational,” but I think we’re on the right track.

Read on…

“This Former Obese ‘Old Guy’ Ethically Bribed 52 Real-World Ageless Living Role Models and Talked Them Into Revealing All Their ‘Forever Young’ Lifestyle Secrets To Him…And Now He’s Sharing These Discoveries With Us!”

Check out the ‘before’ and ‘after’ photos on that webpage.

Wow.

Do you see the guy who lost over 300 pounds??

Yikes!

Thank goodness I don’t need to lose anywhere near that much.

What about you? Do you want to lose a little weight?

Because I think THIS is the place to do it.

52 Real-World people who’ve gone from being…

-out of shape, -pudgy, -fat, -obese and -really obese…

…to hotties who frankly look BETTER than that barely 20 “stick” on that useless DVD I paid $19.95 for!

These are the people who can teach us.

And you know what?

Looking at their “before” photos, I know one thing…

…if they can do it…

…you and I can do it!

http://bevopub.hop.clickbank.net

Lin Stone

P.S. Want an easy shortcut to massive results fast?

Me too.

You’ve heard of role modeling, right?

It’s where you find the people who have the skills, knowledge or results you want.

When you copy their methods, you duplicate their results as fast as humanly possible.

Modeling gives you an unfair advantage that speeds up your rate of progress and slices years off your learning curve.

So why not use modeling to uncover and duplicate the health and fitness strategies of men and women who’ve conquered aging and disease?  http://bevopub.hop.clickbank.net

This news just in: 8/21/08 @ 2:40 AM…

All of the Wal-Marts across Arkansas sold out of ammunition as of yesterday.

One of the purchasers commented that while Russia may have invaded Georgia, they sure ain’t doin’ it to Arkansas.

Ever since Lum & Abner made their fortunes by acting like hillbillies — or how hillbillies were supposed to be anyway — the world takes keen delight in Arkansas antics. And the truth is, Arkansawers (Arkansans is the politically correct term) get more fun out of putting on the hillbilly act than anyone poking fun at them.

I had a friend with me the other day and introduced him to two friends up the road. Because of his accent they were immediately suspicious of him.. “Where you from, Boy?”

New York City. “New York City? There’s not a normal citizen there. I spent two whole weeks in New York and I didn’t see even one person dressed in camo. It ain’t natural. It ain’t natural.”

My dad was probably the worst one of them. He was known as Arky to hundreds of people in Arizona. His favorite story was about visiting an older couple that were having a fight. They were both out on the porch and rocking away, but one facing to the north and one facing to the south. The old woman said. “Jeb, there’s a circus coming over the hill. It’s got elephants and tigers and lions and clowns and everything coming down the hill. Old Jeb kept rocking for a few minutes then he said, “Sarah Jane. i sure wish I was facing that way so’s I could see em.”

But the one I remember best was the one where this family ate their meals outside on a porch and if anything hit the floor they just kicked it through the cracks for the hogs below them to clean it up. Sure enough there came a day that the Arkansas State Sanitation Commission sent an agent to address the issue.

He declared it was his stated opinion that it was unhealthy to have the hogs living right under where the family et. Uncle Joe reared back in his chair and said, “Young feller, I’ll have you know we’ve been living jest like this for the last 30 years — and we haven’t had one hog die a natural death yet.”

Then one morning the family found the old mule had died during the night. “Whatta we going to do now?” asked the old woman. “That old mule is what kept our mortgage paid.”

Well, said the old man. I’m still young and I’m still strong. I’ll be the mule and you do the driving and we’ll get this crop in or I’ll know the reason why. So the old woman agreed to try it. She put the harness on the old man and off they went. She was soon enough ecstatic. The old man was doing a great job, even better pulling than the old mule had been.

But when they got to the end of the field the old man never missed a lick, he just kept right on going, over the turnrow and right on through the ditch and straight on out through the briar patch. The old woman held on as best she could and kept the plow straight. But then she noticed the cliff ahead of them and Joe was heading straight for it. “Joe, Joe. There’s a cliff ahead of us.’

“I know it,” said Joe. “And if you don’t turn me around real soon I’m going to make you be the mule.”

Those samples are what the world likes, but the real truth is that (give or take a few decibels) Arkies are a whole lot smarter than your average bear. We don’t believe for one second that Russia will invade Georgia.

While nobody here expects to see Roosians show up on the door step, we do believe it reasonable to assume that the Chinese might come try collecting their debts any day now. I ain’t got nothing but my sling shot to defend myself with but I can knock a peckerwood out of the tree fifty feet away. So, yawl come.

Half baked Potatoes
Hey, have I ever steered you wrong? At least look at the list of ingredients before you move on.

Two flour tortillas, two eggs, two pieces of cheese, three potatoes

Slice potatoes thin and place in a skillet with grease and fry until about halfway done. Place potatoes on a cookie sheet and bake in the oven at 350 until they begin to brown.

Warm up two tortillas in the skillet. Remove tortillas and place one of them on a plate.
Start two eggs frying In The Skillet. Place one fried egg on top of the first tortilla. Remove half of the baked potatoes from the oven and sprinkle them over the egg. Add salt and pepper to taste. Put a slice of cheese over the potatoes.
Wrap up the tortilla with everything in it, and eat.
Do the same thing for the next batch.
Yields enough to feed one half of a lumberjack.