Floating marine mines were invented by
the Chinese in the 14th century, using inflated
ox bladders. In this century they have cunningly
invented marine "Smart" Mines too, mines smart
enough to border on the brilliant.
Cunning Chinese scientists invented
fireworks centuries
before Francis Scott Key wrote the Star Spangled Banner.
Their
favorite little sparkler was a plunder-triggered land
mine known as "Underground
Sky-Soaring Thunder."
Anyone that plucked up the plunder got triggered sky high on a wave of thunder.
Floating marine mines were invented by
the
Chinese in the 14th century, using inflated
ox bladders. In this century they have
cunningly
invented marine "Smart" Mines too, mines smart
enough to border on the
brilliant.
Actually, they extend a little beyond
the border.
Chinese Smart Mines can tell the difference
between Carriers and Love Boats.
They can even
spot the X in the plosion where the damage would be the most
xasperating.
That's pretty sophisticated for a government that pays
people to cut grass with stainless
steel scissors.
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The American flag should never be used for advertising purposes in any manner whatsoever. It should not be embroidered on such articles as cushions or handkerchiefs and the like, printed or otherwise impressed on paper napkins or boxes or anything that is designed for temporary use and discard. Click HERE for your free copy of an almost complete history of The Flag of the United States of America, The Flag, OUR Flag. Are your insurance premiums killing you? We have NINE WAYS to cut your expenses and get better rates. Compare what you have to pay now with the family-friendly values we find. See if the savings don't average 46% better than what you expect: Health Insurance * Dental Protection Plans * Comprehensive Auto Insurance * Low Cost Life Insurance * Solid Home Insurance * Loving Long Term Care Insurance * Best Family Friendly Insurance Quotes It's simple, it's quick, and yes! It's absolutely FREE. And if you really CAN'T AFFORD insurance, Click HERE for your second-best option. Mansfield Park was Jane Austen's most unpopular novel. To this day the novel still gets hate mail. Yet the suspicion is that with some fictitious name on the cover instead of the author's Mansfield Park would have been acclaimed a masterpiece in its own right. "There's a sucker born every
minute!" That may well be true, but P.T. Barnum did not say it, or think it. The saying came from a competitor trying to explain away the flock of happy spenders surging through Barnum's doors. Barnum's favorite way of advertising was by being talked about. For instance, inside a room with numerous exhibits he put up a sign that said: "This way to the Egress." |
Smart Mines are dangerous even if they don't get loose into the open sea. Recent history tells us that just 1,000 Iraqi sea mines decided military strategists against an amphibious invasion in Desert Storm, and Hussein is so far behind the times that he still uses goats to keep the grass trimmed. The Pentagon doesn't need my advice on how to trim grass on the Carriers. But obviously my skills are required by the grass-roots politicians who are just blowing hot smoke when it comes to defending us from a Chinese invasion. "Whoa, come on now, their sam-pans would never make it across the ocean in one piece!" You are right to be so sarcastic of course, which is why their Smart Mines are designed to let Love Boats in -- and out. Love Boats haul in chicken parts, Rice Krispies, and computer chips. Then the Love Boats haul out scissors, wrenches, and fireworks for our use. Sending us their War Surplus scissors is just a friendly deception. It is those innocuous firecrackers that are carrying the Real Invaders. "For crying out loud, how many Chinamen do you believe can be hiding in a little bitty firecracker?" I admit, the number is probably less than one. But let's face facts here. During the 50th anniversary of their revolution Beijing officials firmly announced development of a helicopter the size of a wasp for its reconnaissance missions. That is positive proof of their powers of miniaturization. Compare those powers to the best us can do: personified in Lockheed's MicroStar. It has only a six-inch wingspan and can do a 20-minute mission at speeds of up to 30 mph while relaying back a video signal. In Europe the Mainz Institute for microtechnology has clearly shown that experimental wasp-sized craft can really fly. Obviousy Beijing is ahead of us in micro-electro-mechanical technology, the very same method used to manufacture those tiny little microchips. "Okay, so they are better than us. So what?" You've heard of the French Connection? No. They are not sending Chinese midgets over here inside their firecrackers; The plot is far more sinister than that. I believe they are infiltrating our shores with Chinese Crabgrass. Americans told them how to do it, of course. For years now our scientists have used four-legged Johnny Appleseeds to help restore our home on the range. They do it by feeding cattle little gelatin capsules filled with native grass seeds. A Department of Agriculture plant geneticist indicates that as many as 55,000 seeds can be hidden in a single capsule! These grass-loaded capsules pass through the kine in a few days and plop out in a patty of pure fertilize, miles and miles away. The sun opens the package, and the winds of nature broadcast the rest. |
Chinese Fireworks don't have to wait on the wind to spread their seeds.
A blast, a poof -- and
who's to even notice the tatters of destruction floating down?
|
Evidence supporting my belief in the Crabgrass Connection is pretty damning: With 628,000,000 pounds of herbicide being used in the United States every year, some of the crabgrass ought to be disappearing. But you know as well as I do, you have more crabgrass in your yard than ever. You can smell those seeds coming from somewhere, and it isn't Denmark. When is the last time you bought a firecracker that was not made in China? The fact is, last year we bought over 79,000,000 pounds of fireworks from Communist China, miniaturizing champion of the world. Is there any way to check all of them for that sprinkling of Chinese Crabgrass seeds? Indeed, are ANY of these firecrackers checked thoroughly?
That is twice a year (once before crabgrass germination time and once during the flowering season) that we xplode their little caches in displays of ecstatic loyalty right over the top of our Nation's Capital. {With every blast the seeds of destruction are being scattered all over Washington. Why some of that crabgrass must fall right on the White House lawn itself.} Meanwhile, all the evidence is blown sky-high by our own hands in dazzling bursts of star spangled affection. The state capitols and other large cities are scarcely less ecstatic with their displays. |
From shore to shining
shore, 98% of the fireworks we
import from Communist China is xploded in less than
eight hour bursts. If just one cracker in a thousand is
popping with half a load of
Chinese Crabgrass it is easy
to explain why we now need second-rate scissors from
China
more than they do!
the end
p.s. Only 23,900 Euromerican kids
are learning Chinese, but 240 million Chinese kids
are learning English. Can you guess from these figures who plans to move
closer to
the people that owe them the most money?
Lin Stone is an author, writer,
photographer. Many more of his works are
available to you for free
reading. Click here for a rather
complete list.
Have you enjoyed this article?
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Frankie and Johnny
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Masters of Disguise tales from
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The Tinted Venus What do you do when Venus comes to life and will love no one, only you? Our young hairdresser wishes to run for his life. This is a complete, full sized book. Please RIGHT CLICK on the title to download your copy to your desktop. |
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